Kate Holden – In My Skin – A Memoir of Addiction

Review From User :

There aren't many books by middle-class, highly-literate university graduates on being drug-addicted streetwalkers, this may be unique.

The author becomes addicted to heroin by accident, just trying it and loving it. She eventually descends through all the levels of hell to being thrown out of her home and walking the streets to sell sex enough to get money for drugs.

She describes all this in a dispassionate voice, but an involved one all the same. She doesn't beg for for our sympathy at her plight but treats her street-walking as she might the lowliest entry into any profession. Her description of sex is graphic and interesting whether she is talking about positions requested or services offered. It is pitiful the amount of money a sex worker brings in and the fear of police and violent clients an ever present danger. She does, at times, get caught by both. At home, a room with scarcely any furniture her boyfriend waits for her to bring money. He lives off her earnings but isn't a pimp, simply unemployable and he says he loves her and she thinks she loves him too.

She makes progress in her career and lands a job in a brothel. She might have to hand over half her money but she has clean sheets, a shower, and the protection of the house and it's staff around her. She is happy and concentrates on being the best prostitute she can, whether it is by means of her looks (she is a tall, extremely good-looking woman), clothes, sexual services or conversation. She covers her heroin addiction from the madam and works as hard as she can just to spend all her money on drugs for her boyfriend and herself. It is heart-breaking, but not for her, she hasn't got there yet.

Her parents are supportive throughout, get her in rehab programmes, on methodone, tough love, easy love, acceptance, whatever it takes. But although she is grateful she is sunk so deep into the lifestyle nothing can help her.

A move to another brothel, a more upmarket one gives her a little more money and she tries to help herself. She moves into a nicer apartment with a garden, and attempts, unsuccessfully, to separate herself from her boyfriend who ultimately will kill himself. She is very much in control of her thoughts, very keen on advancing in her career - to the point of thinking she might like to be a madam herself - but doesn't see life in the clear light of day but only through the soft, warm fuzzy edge of heroin, not that she is aware of that.

Something happens. A switch clicks. Heroin is in short supply and she thinks maybe she could go one day without it. Maybe two...She changes and decides to stop the drugs and slowly, slowly weans herself off methodone as well as heroin. She returns home to her parents to live and to save money for a trip to Europe and the day after she is completely clean, that's it. A new life, flying far from St. Kilda's backstreets in Australia to Paris and thence to Italy.

Home again after an extended stay and a normal love affair, she becomes a writer, a successful one, and remains non-judgemental and non-regretful about her life.

Others have seen this book as disgusting, that she treats prostitution so normally and discusses the details of the sex. Not just working sex, but how some clients do turn her on, and some, told in excruciating detail turn her off. Why is this disgusting Why is it not interesting instead I think it is.

I also think anyone with access to the internet who says they've never viewed porn is either telling porkies or... very, very unusual! We are all interested in sex, it's what's done in the dark and without witnesses, just an act kept secret by those involved. We all know that everyone does more or less the same things but we still like to see it, hear it and read about it. That's just human nature!

This book was a brilliant read. At the other end of prostitution, the highest end where the whores even become tv celebrities and are called 'girlfriends' is Bunny Tales, another brilliant, if bitter read by one of Hefner's harem at the same time as Kendra and Holly were screwing the old man for money. And probably for the same reason. Both the authors were university graduates in disciplines that need good writing - English and Law. But the author of Bunny Tales would never admit even to herself that she was a whore, self-delusion coloured every word she worte, whereas Kate Holden was searingly honest about herself, and therefore a greater joy to read. She's a great girl, the author, and now a successful writer. I wish her all the best in life.

Quote from one whore to another in the brothel:
"If you pull your g-string higher, it makes your legs look longer."
"Shows off your stretch marks.'
"As if I have stretch marks, I have texture!"


Category: Autobiography & Biographies, Non-fiction, Sex Scenes

Called “Quite simply in a class of its own… the work of a stunningly talented writer who both graces and surpasses her material” (Guardian), this is the frank, harrowing, and true story of one young woman’s descent into heroin addiction and prostitution and the long, arduous struggle to redeem her life that made her stronger. A shy, bookish college graduate from a solid middle-class home, Kate Holden was uncertain of her way in life. When she decided to try her first hit of heroin as a one-time adventure with friends, she did not anticipate that the drug would take over. She lost her job and apartment and stole from her family. Desperation drove her first to offer her body on the streets and then in high-class brothels, where she discovered hidden strengths as well as parts of herself that frightened her. With the acceptance and unyielding love of a family that never abandoned her, Kate Holden ultimately defeated the drug and left her netherworld behind.

COMPLETE AUDIOBOOK = > http://vk.cc/3PnJzj

00. Prologue

01. Chapter 01

02. Chapter 02

03. Chapter 03